Somehow, it's the end of July already! For those who may have missed "the news", I am going to be going back to teaching full-time this fall. After two years of being home, I keep having to remind myself that I'm going back to school, so I need to worry about how quickly the summer is going! With workshop week just one short month away, big changes are coming for each and every member of our family.
While I struggled as a stay-at-home mom, I do appreciate the time I had with my boys. I think I will be a more engaged and appreciative mom when I'm not with them all the time, but there are things I will miss. I will miss making pancakes on random weekday mornings. I will miss being able to go to classes with the boys. I will miss volunteering in Connor's classroom. I will miss (very badly!) visiting with Bryce's early intervention team. These three women (Ms. Amanda, Ms. Steph, and Ms. Naomi) have become more than just Bryce's teachers....they are my friends and confidants, my adult conversation every week. They will still visit Bryce, but most weeks it will be at daycare. We will try to work out a time once a month when I can be there, but it won't be the same as seeing them every Thursday.
I am excited to get back in the classroom, but it will be very different for me. I have to get to know all new colleagues and students. I will not be teaching literature, which I will miss. I used to have about 40 students at a time....I will now have probably closer to 150. I am going to a wonderful, large, thriving school, and it is about two miles from my house, so the commute (especially in winter!) cannot be beaten.
I will no longer be working at Cub, and I am SO EXCITED to have my Sundays back! Even when I was teaching before, I worked a couple shifts a week at Cub--including Sundays. I will miss my co-workers there and even some of the customers I have gotten to know, but I can't even tell you how excited I am to have two full family days every weekend. It will also be so much easier for me and the boys when Mike travels.....the boys won't have to be shuffled around every evening. Their schedules won't change at all, other than missing daddy!
For the past couple years, Mike hasn't had to worry about anyone but himself in the morning. He will now have to get both the boys out the door every morning. Bryce wakes up early enough that I will hopefully have him fed and dressed for him, but I don't know that I'll even see Connor before I go.
I'm sure Mike will also appreciate me being done at Cub--we'll be able to tag-team bedtime every night. He will also (hopefully) have a happier, and more fulfilled wife.
Connor's change is the one I am most worried about. I know he will be more than okay--in fact, he's probably going to love it---but he is going to have to grow up so much! We have enrolled Connor in an all-day, every-day kindergarten readiness program. He will be at school with me (yay!), but the middle school has earlier start and end times than the younger students (hence Mike having to drive him in the morning). I worry that we are forcing his childhood to end too soon, but it was kind of an obvious decision (other than the $5900 tuition--yikes!). He absolutely LOVES school, and thrived in class last year. If he weren't in school, he'd be the oldest kid at daycare every day, and I don't know how we could have transported him for part-time preschool. For some reason, the hardest part for me to wrap my head around is him eating lunch at school. Such a big boy!
My hope for Connor is that he is as well-liked in his new class as he was last year. I hope he makes some real friends, so he can stop relying so much on his imaginary ones :) I hope he adjusts okay to being away from home that much. I KNOW he will love having me home in the evenings and Sundays, because he is happiest when the whole family is together.
Daycare. Four days a week. Without his brother. :(
He is an easy-going kid, but did decide to "punish" me a bit on the days he went to daycare this last spring when I was subbing, so I'm not sure what his reaction will be to being there all the time. His daycare provider has mentioned wanting to know what she should work on to keep his development going, but the thought of ME not being the primary caregiver for him during the day is bringing me to tears right now. She doesn't (yet) know the sign language he uses, so I worry that the little communication he is capable of will be lost or overlooked. I hope that being with all those other small kids will inspire him to get up and get walking, but I have no idea what he does all day there. I have a feeling that she coddles him and loves on him, but I worry that he's SO easy that he'll be forgotten. While I will miss my visits with his teachers, it will be good having them go there so they can teach Angie what we are working on.
Bryce has never known a life without a stay-at-home mama. He is best buddies with his big brother. They are going to miss each other so much.
Okay, I thought I was most worried about Connor, but I take that back. Bryce wins that prize.
Grammy (my mom):
Almost every single Wednesday since Connor was born, he has gone to Grammy's house. Wednesday is "Grammy Day". When I was talking with my mom about the full-time preschool option, she said, "But, does that mean I won't have Connor on Wednesdays?!?" That is what it means. It will be an adjustment for Grammy too. We both planned on having one more year before he was at school full-time. She will still have Bryce (we are so thankful, we have always saved a bit of money on daycare because of Grammy Day each week), but no Connor. Connor will miss his Grammy Days, and the days will be MUCH quieter without Connor there. We will have to stay and visit a bit when picking up Bryce each week :)
So, some big changes are coming, but hopefully everyone will adjust well. I really feel like it will be better for my mental health and our family life, having a "normal" work schedule again.
Somehow, Bryce's second birthday is next Thursday, so a 2-year update will be coming soon!