Friday, August 23, 2013

Beginning of the End....

        In a few weeks, my first baby will start preschool. In some ways, it has been a long time coming, but in other ways I can't believe it. I have been so excited for him to start preschool....being a November baby, he's been three for a while now, but wasn't old enough to start last year. He is so ready, and I think it's going to be very good for him. I think it will also be good for our relationship...like any three year old, he is very strong-willed, and being home this last year, we have butted heads on a regular basis. Having a break from one another a couple mornings a week will probably be good for us.

      But, as the actual start of school draws near, the excitement is morphing into something else. Something that makes me really close to tears every time I think about it. It's the end of his babyhood. It's the end of that time together that everyone says goes so fast. The end of the really, really difficult time that everyone told me to appreciate while it lasted....and many days I haven't appreciated it. And now I'm sorry for that. Yes, I realize he'll only be gone for three hours, two days a week. But it's the beginning of the end.

     School means new friends, new independence, new skills....but it also means new insecurities, hurt feelings, injustices, and hard lessons. Things that will break my heart because they break his. I know that this is how kids learn, and that we all went through it, but I dread it. I dread feeling that hurt for my kids. I hope I can make through all that without punching some kid for messing with mine (kidding....kind of). I hope I can teach Connor how to make it through all that without making my anxieties rub off on him. I hope I can love him so much he'll have confidence and security no matter what happens at school.

    


    Dear Connor,

I am so proud of you. You surprised us by coming six weeks early, and haven't stop surprising us ever since. You surprise us with your humor, compassion, and unbelievable vocabulary. The way you comprehend and process things is far beyond that of a three-year old. You hold me accountable for my actions the way I hold you accountable for yours. You have been my greatest teacher and best buddy. I am sorry for the times I didn't appreciate every second I've gotten to spend at home with you. I know you will do so well at preschool. Your teachers and classmates will be so lucky to have a character like you in their class. I can't wait to watch you learn and grow even more, but I also want you to stay my baby forever. Don't leave your mama, okay? I love you whole world, big boy.

    Love, Mama

Friday, August 16, 2013

Bryce is ONE!

Hi Friends,
 
   I'm so late with this post, but between Mike and I both traveling and kids who don't want to nap, I haven't found the time to blog!

   On July 31st, our little sweetheart turned one. Even though in some ways Bryce was born a lifetime ago, I remember all the details of his birth and time in the hospital like it was yesterday, so it's hard to believe it's been a whole year.

    Bryce got to spend his real birthday with his Grammy (my mom), because I had to work. She made us a joint birthday dinner and cake that evening. Bryce LOVES to eat, so he was happy! The following Saturday, we had a little family birthday party for him. It was a beautiful day, so we were able to be outside. It was a great day! Connor is always an excellent host and very excited for everyone to be at our house.

  





 Dear Bryce, 

     At twelve months, you are such a joy. Even though there has been a slow-down in your large motor skills lately, you have been focusing instead on fine motor skills and developing your stubborn, sassy, and sweet personality. You love to make faces (especially for the camera), and have quite a loud scream when you think you're not getting enough attention. You say "hi" by waving (seeing your cute chubby hand on the end of that short little arm melts my heart every time), smile at everyone, and finally raise your own arms when I ask "how big is Brycey?". You LOVE harassing your brother by grabbing at his toys, and harassing mama by grabbing any electrical cord, dog toy, or anything else you're not supposed to have. I really fear that I will have my hands full with you when you start walking! It took you a while to get the hang of feeding yourself, but one day you just got it, and never turned back. You LOVE eating, and aren't very happy when I still try to give you baby food. Bryce, I am so proud of you and all of your accomplishments. Right when I start to feel down about things, you do something that brings me to tears and shows me it will be alright. You do things at your own pace, and you do it all with a smile. Thank you, sweet Bryce, for choosing me to be your mom! 

xoxo